Last night I had an unpleasant experience.
After being asleep for only a few hours, I woke up to the sound of water running and a man's voice. At first I thought I woke up to the sounds of Mom and Dad getting ready, listening to NPR, just like normal. That is, until I looked at my clock and it read 1:45 am. I couldn't figure out why they would be getting ready so early, so I crept out of my room and looked up the stairs, and none of the lights were on, but I still heard what I thought to be the radio, really really loud. I went back to bed and still, the voice wasn't going away, and I couldn't figure out why.
Then it hit me: there was a psychopath flooding my house upstairs, and who had randomly turned on the radio, because he was crazy. This was unsettling, to say the least.
I got out of bed once again, put on a sweater (though why I did, I don't know) grabbed my Louisville Slugger Mini Bat (because this was sure to do some damage, just like there was a psychopath in our house) and turned on my bedroom light. I saw that the cable box was on, as was the surround sound, and I realized the psychopath had turned on the cable. I turned both off, and hurried back to bed, where I prayed that I wouldn't die. I didn't want to go upstairs to check on Mom and Dad, because either they'd been attacked or I would be snatched.
Finally, the water turned off, and I slowly fell back to sleep, where I considered the fact that maybe this had all been in my head and that maybe I just was sleepwalking. But that didn't change the fact that I had gotten out of bed, put on a sweater, grabbed my cell phone (did I not mention that earlier? I did. Maybe to call 9-1-1. I don't know) and my mini-bat and went turned of the cable.
Don't worry. I woke up a few hours later, Mom and Dad were fine. Dad told me that the water softener turns on in the middle of the night, and that he left the cable on to finish recording something. Mom told me that once, when she was all by her onesie in the house, the surround sound turned on, but she survived.
Thus ends the account in which Megan lost her sanity.
4 comments:
Classic. You and Jeremy, both just so willing to sit and wait to die when the boogey man comes (I speak, of course, of the time he barrel-rolled me off the bed and cowered with me in the corner rather than facing the "guy with the knife" and protecting me. You know what I'm talking about).
That said, I'm glad you're still with us. Great story. :)
I think someone in this family like Jane Austen... :p
I am always quoting Pride and Prejudice (with a little Sense and Sensibility thrown in for effect). Yet whenever I say, "Name that movie," what does JB say? "Emma." Bah.
That uncultured swine. ;)
Post a Comment